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How to resolve conflict in a relationship when both feel strongly

by Dinushan Thiranjaya Somasiri Deenawaththage Don 24 Dec 2023
How to resolve conflict in a relationship when both feel strongly

Conflict in relationships is inevitable, but the way it is managed can either strengthen or weaken the bond between partners. When both individuals feel strongly about their positions, resolving conflict requires careful communication, empathy, and sometimes, compromise. The ability to navigate these disagreements effectively is crucial for the health and longevity of the relationship.

1. Direct Communication

One of the first steps in resolving conflict is to express thoughts and feelings directly. This involves using, 'I feel' statements to describe emotions without blaming the partner, which can help keep the focus on the issue at hand rather than turning the conversation into a blame game. Direct communication allows both partners to express their perspectives and concerns openly, fostering understanding and empathy. It also promotes active listening, as each partner can fully comprehend the other's point of view. By avoiding blame and focusing on emotions, direct communication creates a safe space for honest dialogue and paves the way for effective conflict resolution.

2. The Role of Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. It is a key skill in resolving conflicts as it allows individuals to communicate better, build trust, and find common ground. Empathy can help avoid assumptions and biases that might escalate the problem. By putting oneself in the other person's shoes, empathy allows for a deeper understanding of their perspective and emotions. This understanding can lead to more productive and respectful conversations, as it helps to validate the other person's experiences and feelings. Additionally, empathy can help to break down barriers and build bridges between individuals, fostering a sense of connection and cooperation in conflict resolution.

3. Sticking to One Argument

It is important to stick to one argument at a time to prevent the discussion from derailing. Bringing up past conflicts can complicate the current issue and hinder the resolution process. By focusing on one argument at a time, both parties can stay focused and address the specific concerns at hand. This approach allows for a more efficient and effective resolution process, as it avoids unnecessary distractions and ensures that each issue is thoroughly addressed. Moreover, sticking to one argument promotes clarity and prevents misunderstandings, enabling both individuals to communicate their perspectives more effectively.

4. Compromise

Compromise involves finding a middle ground where both partners can agree, even if it's not the ideal solution for either. It's about meeting each other halfway and ensuring that both parties' needs are met. Compromise is an essential aspect of any healthy relationship as it fosters understanding and cooperation between partners. By finding a middle ground, both individuals can feel heard and valued, which strengthens the bond between them. Additionally, compromise encourages flexibility and adaptability, allowing couples to navigate future challenges with greater ease.

5. Healthy Communication Tips

Healthy communication is essential for managing conflict. This includes staying focused on the current issue, respecting each other's perspectives, and working towards a solution that is acceptable to both parties. It is important to actively listen to each other without interrupting, and to express thoughts and feelings in a calm and respectful manner. Additionally, using "I" statements instead of "you" statements can help avoid blame and defensiveness, fostering a more productive conversation.

6. The Importance of Boundaries

Establishing and respecting boundaries is crucial during conflicts. This means treating each other with respect and knowing when to disengage if the argument is not productive. Setting boundaries helps to create a safe and healthy environment for both parties involved in the conflict. It allows individuals to express their needs and limits, ensuring that their emotions and well-being are protected. By recognizing when a conversation is not productive, it is possible to take a step back and revisit the issue at a later time when both parties are more open to finding a resolution.

7. Knowing When to Let Go

Sometimes, the best resolution is to agree to disagree, especially if the issue is not critical to the relationship's overall health. Knowing when to let go can prevent further damage to the relationship and preserve the overall harmony. It is important to prioritize the well-being of both parties and understand that not all conflicts can be resolved in a satisfactory manner. In such cases, accepting differences and moving forward without holding onto resentment can lead to a healthier and more peaceful dynamic.

8. The Role of Romantic Gifts

Romantic Gifts can be a gesture of goodwill and an expression of understanding and care. They can serve as a peace offering or a way to show appreciation for the partner's perspective, helping to soften the atmosphere during a conflict. By giving romantic gifts, partners can show that they value and respect each other's feelings, even in times of disagreement. These gestures can create a sense of emotional connection and remind both parties of the love and affection they share, ultimately strengthening the bond between them.


Resolving conflict in a relationship when both parties feel strongly is a delicate process that requires communication, empathy, and sometimes compromise. By focusing on these key areas, partners can navigate their disagreements and emerge with a stronger, more understanding relationship.


Q: How can I express my feelings without starting an argument?

A: Use "I feel" statements to express your emotions without blaming your partner, and focus on the specific behavior that is bothering you.


Q: Is it okay to bring up past issues during a conflict?

A: It's best to stick to the current issue. Bringing up the past can complicate the discussion and prevent you from resolving the present conflict.


Q: How can empathy help resolve conflicts?

A: Empathy allows you to understand your partner's perspective, which can help you communicate more effectively and find a solution that works for both of you.


Q: What if my partner and I can't agree on a solution?

A: If you can't find a compromise, it may be necessary to agree to disagree, especially if the issue is not detrimental to the relationship.


Q: Can giving a gift help resolve a conflict?

A: While a gift should not replace communication and understanding, it can be a kind gesture that shows your partner you care and are committed to resolving the conflict.


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